I am certain that at least once a day I have the thought, "HOW did Mom do it?" Eight kids? Really? I don't have too many memories of Mom "losing it". Seriously, Mom? I am baffled. But more than that I am grateful.
I am grateful for...
- The way she always could and still can make me feel safe, calm, and peacful. There have been so many times since I've left home that I just think, "I just need to lay my head on Mom's lap and have her stroke my hair and tell me that everything is going to be okay."
- The way she could turn simple, everyday moments into teaching opportunities. I remember coloring in the kitchen when I was about 6 years old. I was a hopeless romantic so I was probably drawing a bride and groom. Mom asked me where I was going to get married. I shrugged and said something like, "I don't know - wherever my husband wants to. Maybe if it's raning outside we can get married in the Temple." Mom made it very clear that the Temple was the place to get married and that it was about so much more than a roof to sheild us from the rain. She showed me through her example the importance of being Temple-worthy and creating a Celestial Marriage.
- The way she always had my back. I remember being so surprised and thinking "YEAH! Go Mom!" when I was five and came home crying from the neighbor's house in Michigan. When I told her what had happened, she referred to the neighbor boy as a 'little brat'. MUCH more importantly, when I was in 7th grade and had a bully, Mom would cry with me after school about my hurt feelings. She sent me to school one day with a little token of some kind to put in my pocket so that when I needed to remember I wasn't alone, I could reach in my pocket and know that Mom was praying for and thinking about me. A few days later as I was headed out the door, but I ran back to my room and told Mom "Oh, I forgot my lucky earrings." Mom told me that she didn't think I should rely on lucky earrings, but maybe try saying a prayer. We knelt down together and prayed for the girl who was mean to me. Not only did this show me how much my mother cared about my personal problems, but this also taught me to rely on the Lord and to have compassion.
- For as long as I can remember, I wanted to be a mom. I'm guessing that a large part of my fascination for motherhood came from a respect and admiration for my mother. When I was about 11 I remember becoming especially protective of Mom as I watched her struggle with some of my 'teenage siblings'. I made sure that I always got to sit next to her at the dinner table and defended her around my siblings. Chalonn and Chelise started to [lovingly] tease me by calling me "Mom Jr." Devin caught on and one day chased me around the house calling me Mom Jr. I ran away from him crying. But really -- what an honor. I wish someone would call me that today. I dreamed of the day that I could have babies of my own, be a homemaker, and take care of my family. I love that Mom still calls and asks me sometimes "So, what are you having for dinner tonight?" -- there are little things like dinnertime that mater to me, and I'm grateful that Mom gets that and appreciates that.
- Mom always encouraged me to be myself. She let me figure out who that was and supported me along the way. I especially rememeber when we lived in Chile that I was at that age of finding myself. She gave me independence to explore my world and she was there to talk to about everything. She became one of my best friends. I trusted her and felt that she trusted me. That was so important to me in finding my self confidence. (And I'm sorry for what I said, Mom, about the reason I wouldn't keep my room clean. I don't even remember saying that OR thinking that.)
I love my Mom and look forward to sharing more memories and lessons learned from her. She is such a beautiful person and I am so grateful that I get to be her daughter.
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